I did not take a New year resolution.
10 days into 2014 and already I have no blog posts up.
Despicable.
I am sorry for that dear reader. I might not be Oprah or Fotso Victor or 2face idibia but I know you are reading this and that means a lot to me. You deserve better.
A lot has been happening and as much as I always have something to do, I realize the only thing stopping me from doing what I really want to do (writing, etc.) is me. That’s stopping now.
I will self-publish during this year.
I am tired of counting on people.
Why?
For starters, everyone has a life-ONE life. You can’t live for other persons. I don’t know whether there is a law governing quantification of pain or trouble or sorrow; but one thing I know for sure is- my pinch could be your blow (I hope that makes sense).
I am gifted. So are you and everyone still chanced to walk on earth, and while we are alive, we choose to either be “…busy living or busy dying”- Andy Dufresne,The Shawshank Redemption 1994 –Awesome movie- If you haven’t watched it…you should.
Blue pill or red pill, the choice is ours.
It’s getting worse:
1. My desire to impact the world around me is taking me to various levels. As I write this, I have a meeting with a writer tomorrow just for the sake of meeting ‘someone like me’! Well…not entirely since SHE ACTUALLY WRITES!!
2. I did not yet tell you about the GOLDEN JUBILEE CELEBRATION of my alma mater — St. Bede’s College Ashing-Kom my former boarding school .I will be putting up a post on the whole journey ( together with the pictures) on Sunday. Sadly…I lost one of my phones during this trip. I still have survivor’s guilt …
3. I have grown thin. Well, that is what almost everyone is saying…I don’t how true that is. However, I am not anorexic. A friend suggested: “When you are worried or stressed, you lose weight no matter how much you eat”. I truly hope she is wrong.
I know she’s not.
I once watched a TED conference on viewing stress more positively (Kelly MCGONIGAL- Health Psychologist JUNE 2013. I’m working on that.
4. As for my love life, it is truly getting worse. I don’t know what love is (Note to self: Write a post on this) but I clearly have not met with what ‘mainstream’ media portrays as ‘falling IN love’. May be I just use my brain too much to analyze feelings…maybe I’m a robot. Meh.
But Better:
1. I have returned to reading My favorite Blogger and writer . He has been inspiring me since May 2012 when I decided to do a total switch from a Medical Laboratory Science undergraduate degree to one in Journalism and Mass Communication.
Since I don’t have constant internet access, (and I have finally come to terms with that part of my life) I have approximately 280MB of saved files from his blog. He knows it not, but he is my mentor. Do read his blog : he is funny, smart and always has a lesson you or someone in your environment could benefit from .In fact…I will be writing a review about his recent book –Choose Yourself-soon. He tweets @jaltucher
2. I have grown-up. This should be a full blog post-I think have grown-up… here is why. I now can fully acknowledge that I don’t like being single. I dig intimacy too much to waste time on a meaningless relationship. As much as I fear trusting people…I enjoy when I can finally count on someone and talk up to 1am without feeling bored or tired.
3. My school results are on the rise, together with my ‘human’ relationships. A good friend helped me with a lot of diplomacy lately and made me realize that; when you are on the wrong, do everything to fix (peacefully) whatever you have destroyed AND do WHATEVER YOU MUST- BEG,PLEAD,KNEEL if you have to in order to leave peacefully. Always forgive and try to forget.
Reason: You don’t know tomorrow.
4. I bought a couple of books two days ago. I hardly find books worth buying but this time I did- Blue Bloods by Melissa De La Cruz, Vampire Academy by Rachelle Mead (I was simply impressed by the youthful nature of the author) and most especially: “Thirteen Stories by Eudora Welty”- I know I will learn more about writing short stories by reading them rather than reading : How to write Short Stories. It did cost me some money though…plus the cable bill…plus my new keyboard and mouse for my writing sprees…and I have no idea how I will survive the month on my current budget.
I don’t know if things will get better with time. As the year rolls on, things will happen.
I will make my dent on the universe. But right now…this song says it all about how I feel…I am listening to it as I end this…enjoy…. Cheers.